We will miss you, Grandma

Mary Leona Dillman Eldredge, better known as Grandma or G, passed away this morning some time after 7:00am.  I got to kiss her on the forehead before I went to work this morning.  Thanks and love to all those who knew, loved, and/or appreciated how amazing she was.  Thank you for all the support you have offered.

Smiles

We have G's hospital bed in the front room facing the beautiful view that anyone can get sucked into staring at for hours.  She's very sleepy and she can barely talk.  Mostly, she mumbles and tries to nod and use her eyebrows.  She has been so sweet to all her visitors and I'm glad she is surrounded by loved ones.  Everyone is in tears because we all love her so much.

Every time she's been awake and I've gone to her bed, she gives me a big smile and widens her eyes to try to connect as much as she can.  I am loving her smiles.

Dreams

I sent an email of my dream last night to my older sister:

I just had a dream about a super popular girl. The only way guys would ask her out is by bringing posterboards with solicitations as if they were at a football game or something. She was walking through the park with her husband and kept running into old high school classmates who had brought their signs to ask her out. One of the guys she ran into asked her how she was doing, and expressed how disappointed he was that she was married, "Naturally I made my signs, figured I had to give it my best shot. Seeing some of the people from high school is really a trip right? Some of these guys have really changed."

Then she ran into another class mate who said, "Oh, it's so nice to see you! I've made my sign, but I guess you aren't interested. What have I been up to? Well, my ex-wife has turned into quite the liberal and has been making me into one as well. She's decided I should run for office and to use the domain she already owns, 'leeanntherepublican.com'. Why buy a different one?"

So she sent me her dream:

I dreamed G pooped and you and I were like, "Well, what now?"

Jazz

G said she was listening to her irregular heartbeat when they were doing a sonogram and she tried to mimic the sounds her heart makes.  She sounded like a jazz bassist.  "boom-boo, bumpa da, bleedee-dip".  And it reminded me of PFT's jazz riff.

We were laughing and giggling about it.  It was a pleasant night.

I guess this has to be a somber post.

G had some trouble yesterday as she was throwing up and couldn't get any food down.  Anna took her to the ER today and it looks like she has a kinked bowel.  The surgeon said he really thinks it won't unkink itself and surgery is likely her only option, but he will try to drain her stomach over the next few days in hopes of helping the obstruction to unwind.

It isn't likely it will resolve itself and this is a pretty serious impasse.  G is handling it like a trooper, but is sad she will be in the hospital for the next few days, at the very least.

If you pray, please put her in your prayers.  We love her and maybe this is her time, but we are kind of selfish and want her around as long as possible.

Pest Control

I didn't stay late at work yesterday, despite the fact that I have so much work to do, because G's evening care worker wasn't able to come.  We don't like to leave G alone, so I made sure I was home earlier than usual.  When I was driving up, I heard some tapping noises and saw two beautiful bucks walking away from G's yard.  There was Ti-ti, G's daytime worker, rapping a stick on a tree to scare them away.

Apparently the deer had been bothering G and Ti-ti had to go outside in the 100 degree weather to chase them away three times because they kept coming back.

"Those deer were eating my bushes!  They better not come back."

I just love how irritated G got with some harmless deer in her yard.  It's not like we have a well manicured lawn.  I don't see the harm in having a few deer hang out for a while.

Phone Problems

"Esther, come here for a minute."

This has always been the command before a never-ending and exhausting task.  She said that before I helped her clean out the garage after Grandpa died.  She said that before she had me spend two days weeding her bank.  She said that before we spent six hours cleaning the light fixtures in her home which ended up in us cussing each other out, as the cleaning of her light fixtures always reduces people to do.

Lately, it has come to mean she will engage you in never ending dialogue about imaginary problems that her brain keeps inventing.

Today she kept pointing behind the phone and saying she needed me to help her figure out her phone coverage and how she thinks her number was taken away.  I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, so I tried to keep a straight face and take her seriously.  She's had the same number for probably at least forty years.  Anna asked her, "Grandma, what is your phone number?"

"967-7841."

That is not her number.  At all.  And from what I can remember, it never has been.  She kept pointing behind the phone as if something was physically there to explain the whole problem.  Anna and I kept explaining she has the same number and she hasn't lost any coverage.

After about 45 minutes, I finally had to kiss her on the head, turn Law and Order: SVU on and leave the room.

Liar

Monday night is the night G has a meeting with her church friends to talk about a book or pre-determined topic.  Lately she has been avoiding going because she feels embarrassed about losing some of her mental faculties. Last night she told her helper that Myrna had cancelled the meeting this week.  Anna didn't believe her and called another group member who said it was still on at his house.  So Anna told her she had to go and be with her friends.  G called Anna a liar and started dragging her feet as Sulita started to wheel her out.

G: "How did you find out it is still on?"

Anna: "Alan Peterson said he's having it at his house."

G: "Did he call you or did you call him?"

Anna: "I called him."

G: "Darn you."

Clothes

G has always been sort of free with her body when we've always been more modest.  When we were kids she couldn't understand why we were so shy to change around each other.  "Oh you girls are just a bunch of prudes!"

Yesterday she walked up to Anna and asked, "Why do you have me in all these clothes?  Do I really need to be wearing all these clothes?"

"Yes, Grandma, you need to wear clothes."

"Well, I don't see why you made me wear a bra to church."

Dancing Grandma

Now that Grandma's extremities are on the mend, we are making her walk more.  Anna got her up from her chair the other night and started dancing with her.  It was the absolute cutest thing I have ever seen.  G was smiling and having a great time and didn't want to stop.

Anna asked her, "So who's your favorite?"

G grinned, "You are!"

Then she noticed I was standing behind them giggling and she said, "...and everyone else too!"

Poor Peaches

G loves it when we play any sort of Mario game on the Wii because she loves Princess Peach.  She will stop whatever she is doing to watch the game and root for Peach.  Watching how much G loves Peach is so much fun.

We were playing Mario Party the other night and we made Peach a computer player.  Peach lost one of the mini-games and G laments, "Poor Peaches."

Pineapple

It was my aunt's birthday the other night and we had pineapple for dessert.  My parents were over for dinner along with my Aunt Jo and Uncle Tom.  I was being really immature and giggling at how much my dad was piling on his plate as one rumor about pineapple is that it is supposed to make semen taste better.

So my brother, sister and I are all laughing because my uncle won't eat any and my aunt and uncle ask us what we are giggling about.  Anna announces, "Pineapple's supposed to make your cum taste better."

Right after Anna, who is sitting right next to G, announces the effects of pineapple, Grandma loudly announces, "Tom, don't you want some pineapple?"

Ti-Ti is mean.

I came home yesterday and sat down with G to ask her how she is doing.

"I can't believe it.  Ti-Ti made me walk all the way from the bathroom to the living room."  G looked as if someone had said the c-word to her or something equally offensive.

We had to push G kicking and screaming, sometimes literally, into going into a wheelchair while her feet heal and now she refuses to walk.

Trust Issues

We took G to a brunch this weekend all the way out in Rocklin.  On the drive out G was freaking out, "Where are you taking me?"

"To brunch, Grandma.  It will be good!"

"We're going too far, let's just go to Marie Callender's."

"No, we're going to Rocklin.  It will be ok."

"I don't want to go to Rocklin."

"Don't you trust us Grandma?"

"Yes."

"Then it will be ok, we are going to take care of you."

"Turn around, I want to go to Marie Callender's."

"Grandma, you said you trusted us."

"Well, I don't anymore."

First Shift

So, G is like an aids patient and has no capability of healing from her wounds because all she eats is sugar and she's ancient.  Tonight, again, she wouldn't eat her dinner, but ate the ice cream i brought home to her, not knowing she didn't eat any dinner.

A few years ago she got this gigantic bed sore on her ass and it was a whole ordeal.  Medicated gauze had to be stuffed in it twice a day and pulled out and cleaned and redressed.  I only did it a few times because I wasn't good enough for her.  She liked Anna better, which is one time that bias has paid off.

We came home today and she developed a level one ulcer on her ass.  We aren't even done getting her feet healed and she's already starting her next year long medical plan of action.  We think she got the sore from sleeping on her back for too long last night, so we are taking two hour shifts to wake her up and make sure she turns over.  It's my shift first.  So, I'm up until midnight.  Yay.

Anna is still the favorite.

Anna is still G's favorite, which I never hope to change.  Life is too fun watching G in her clearly biased opinions.

For my birthday, G not only gave me a card, she also gave Anna a card with cash in it.

I don't want to go to bed.

I feel bad as I was in Vacaville all weekend being overloaded with math, Anna was taking care of G.  By the time I got home Sunday night, she was completely unhinged.  But Anna was still sweet and went to turn down G's bed.  When Anna came back into the room, G had re-made the bed and was smoothing out the comforter.

"Grandma, why are you making the bed?  It's time to get in the bed."

"I don't want to go to bed."

"It's 10:30.  You have to go to bed."

"I don't want to go to bed.  What will I do in here?"

"Well, you can watch TV, eat the snacks hidden in your drawer, read any of the books we put on your Kindle, or you can go to sleep."

"I don't want to go to bed."

"Too bad, it's time to go to bed, I have to get up early in the morning."

"You girls go to bed so early."

Vegetables

I made roasted vegetables and mashed potatoes to go with some left over beef with wine sauce Anna had made. And G actually cleaned her plate.

"Grandma, can I get you more of anything?"

"I sure don't want any more of those vegetables."  She said the word vegetables as if there was a rotten egg in her mouth.

Ten minutes later, I was clearing her plate and I asked if she was sure she didn't want anything else.

"Well, you could get me one more of those carrots.  Those were delicious."

Peas Porridge Hot

When I came home, G was pretty depressed about how fast she is losing her memory, so I started telling her my favorite stories about coming to Grandma's as a kid.

I told her about how she and Grandpa Hal would take us fishing in this little pond and Grandpa Hal would put the worms on and take the fish off the hooks because that was a gross job we didn't want to do.

I told her about the time I caught a huge catfish and she let me keep it as a pet.  I named it King Kong and we put it in an empty garbage can with water and it survived less than an hour after we brought it home, so we had a funeral for it and buried it in the back yard.

We talked about how much Grandpa Hal would love Abby and Allie if he were still here and how he would chant with them the same game he chanted with us when we were that age:

Peas porridge hot
Peas porridge cold
Peas porridge in the pot nine days old

Some like it hot
Some like it cold
Some like it in the pot nine days old

I never understood what that meant, but Grandpa Hal would say it in his very crackly voice with his huge goofy grin and laugh every time he got to the end of it.  As I started chanting it, G started chanting with me.

"Oh Esther, thanks for putting some good memories back in me."

Wednesday Night: Part III--Bedtime

G is having worse anxiety and she keeps talking about the coverage and now she thinks the phone by her chair is not plugged in to the rest of the phone system in the house.  She kept going over it for about 20 minutes and we finally had to tell her, "It's time to go to bed. "

"I don't want to go to bed."

Anna grabbed the wheelchair and said, "Grandma, we need to go to bed, we have to get up early.  It's time."

"No!  Please don't make me go!"

OMG.  She is so cute.